So I've got some great news about my tennis outings, which I am still attending on a weekly basis. They are building brand new tennis courts at Mill Creek now. The news was in the Statesboro Herald today. I would like to share the article with you all now:
Statatesboro Bulloch County Parks and Recreation are getting brand new tennis courts at Mill Creek Recreation park. The new courts will be state of the art and offer the community and the SBCPR Tennis League a new place to play. Currently there are two locations for people to play tennis. The original courts at the Honey Bowen building at the old rec dept facility and in Portal by the new high school. The new facility will offer lighted courts.
Alex Smith, director of the tennis league was asked about the new courts. "We are really excited about the new courts being constructed and hope it will give people the ability to enjoy not only playing tennis but also watching at the new center court that will offer stadium style seating for observing the Thursday night mixed doubles matches. When asked why the community needed new courts Smith answered, "The community was in need of new state of the art courts after the newest member of the tennis league started playing regularly. Mr. Greg Bryson is our newest member and this new facility will really give the whole community the forum to witness his awesome tennis skills. Also his (Mr. Bryson's) serves are so powerful that it is actually causing damage to the older, existing courts. Cracks have started to develop almost instantaneously upon his serves hitting the playing surface." Mr Smith was asked how the new courts surface would remedy this problem, "The new courts will be designed and constructed similar to how the launch pads at Cape Canaverl are built to withstand the force of a shuttle launch. When asked Smith said "his serves are probably as powerful as if not more powerful than the main thrusters at liftoff of a space shuttle launch. I only hope that this new method of construction will hold up to his insane power. We have already had an incident where a participant fell victim to the power of Greg's insane serve*. I think that this new facility will help the people of Statesboro be able to come out and cheer on there golden son."
Well the community may have to wait for the new tennis facility but it can witness the awesomeness that is Greg every week on Thursday during his doubles matches.
OK so I may have exaggerated a little. Hell I made that whole article up. The only thing that was in the paper was a picture of some work on the new tennis courts.
Now there was a part I did not make up. The * in the fictitious article did happen
It was my second week playing and I was serving. I am not particularly good at serving. Mainly because I try to look like Nadal when I serve. Problem is I really do not have a clue how to make what looks like a good serve actually be a good serve. Practice would probably help.
So I'm working on trying to control my serve which turns into a very weak serve but whatever. Well halfway through my only match that week I don't know what happened but I let one rip. It felt good coming off of the racquet. Problem is it went right into the back of someones head. And that someone just happened to be my playing partner. Who was a girl. As bad as that sounds, it was beautiful. I mean it hit her right in the center of the back of her head.
When it hit her, her hair went every where and the ball, which I did not see this but was later told about it, shot off of her head and out of the court area all together. It was just like in a movie when someone gets shot and their head snaps back. And then she hit the deck
Now in my defense, she was standing in the middle of the court every time I served. Sad thing is, I knew I was going to hit her at some point. That's not to say I did it on purpose because I didn't. Its just that when you don't have any type of actual control and then your partner stands in the middle of the court eliminating 90% of the window you have to get the ball into its bound to happen.
After she hit the deck she started saying that it was the third time tonight she had been hit by the ball. Seems to me maybe you would figure out to get out of the way. But now I'm just trying to place blame on her and I should not do that. I do blame her though for me not being able to serve after that. I was too worried that I may hit her again. We lost the match too.
As a matter of fact I have yet to actually win a match.
Anyway, I am going to post this without actually proofing it first but it is late and I a m ready to go to bed. I have noticed that I use far to many contractions when I type. Also this little keyboard that comes with a Mac is terrible for any prolonged typing.
Stairway to heaven is on. That kind of creeps me out late at night. Do not play it backwards. It really works. Just saying.
peace out
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Leprechaun Traps and Pinewood Derby Cars
Let me start by saying I need to get a lot more followrs to this blog soI can get some advertisers and buy me a new mac book air or pro whichever. I tried to do this last night with my old Dell laptop and it was so slow that I managed to cook dinner while I waited on the browser to pull up. But anyway...on to the story.
So B started pre-k last year and before everyone gets started I know it is the middle of the year but she is in school and thats all that matters. Well she had an assignment to build a leprechaun trap. I originally thought why not just go buy a regualar trap for a racoon or possum and be done with it. Well obviously that was not going to work so I had to come up with something creative. The problem here is I've been told in the past that I do not have a creative bone in my body. Seriously I was told that. But what I lack in creativity I make up for with sarcassam. Anyway, so I figured what we could do is get us a shoe box and paint it and then put some glitter on it and some cotton balls for clouds and B could color some rainbows. Which at this point in the story I was starting to get a bit concerned with how fabulous I wanted this trap to turn out.
Well I had to run my ideas by B and see what she thought about it. She was on board. Her biggest concern was what we would do with the leprechaun once we captured him. I had some suggestions but she was not keen on them. So we needed to make a trip to Hobby Lobby to procure the needed supplies because unlike popular belief I don't keep a lot of glitter and such at my house. Whilst we are shopping for supplies we find what will make some good fake gold coins for the trap. Now I had already decided if I could fashion a pot out of construction paper that would be marvelous. After we got the "cons" B proceeds to hatch a plan for the capturing of the Green Bastard. We will put the coins in the trap, he will try to eat the coins because he is greedy as she informed me thus causing him to fall ill, and then we will be able to catch him.I told her I thought it was mean that we would try to make him sick to which she replied,"Well its better than your idea daddy. You wanted to kill him." Touche, kiddo, touche. So now we have gold glitter, gold coins, glue, and glitter clue. I am not sure why I purchased glitter glue when I just bought all the ingredients for glitter clue as well but hey thats what B said we needed. Oh and green spray paint.
so that afternoon we go to a birthday party and after it was over my buddy said we should work on the trap and his two daughters pinewood derby cars. Now last year he did this and his daughters did not do very well in the race. That was not going to be the case this year apparently because he had manuals for how to tweak the cars, axle finishing tools, and wheel smoothing mandrels. I am not making this up at all. Seems there is a whole section of pine wood derby car supplies at the Hobby Lobby as well not just Liberace decorating materials. So we have two stations setup in his barn. The leprechaun trap painting section and the derby car tuning station. The trap painting was pretty simple. Or so it wud seem but a four year old and a can of spray paint does not make a good pairing. There are portions of the trap that have a very good, thick coat of green paint on it. I didnt know you could actually mound up paint like that. The derby tuning was a bit simpler mainly because it didnt seem that we were actually doing anything. You just had to put each axle which looked a whole lot like a nail to me into a drill and one person started the drill while another held sand paper against it to smooth out any imperfections in the axle. See the imperfections cause friction and friction is a derby car's worst enemy. Same goes for the wheels. When they are popped out of the molds there are imerfections on them. So you go through the same type of process with them to make them as efficient as possible. I did not realize that this was going to turn into a derby car setup instructional blog but it seems to have done just that. You are all welcome. Anyway, it is getting late and its time to close up shop for the evening so we pack up the newley painted trap and head home.
The next morning its time to complete the construction of the trap. So B takes a paint brush and coats he inside with glue and then we pour in the glitter. While she does this I fashion me a cauldron out of construction paper. Lets just sa in my mind it looked a lot better. I guess I really don't have any creativity in me. B colors some rainbows to glue on the trap and I find some cotton balls for her to glue to it as well to simulate clouds because remember we are trying to lure a leprechaun into the trap. B starts on the cloud project and I step out of the room because why wouldn't you leave your daughter with a bowl of glue, glitter, and cotton balls? Well when I come back she is no longer working on clouds. Oh no. She is making him a bed in the trap because she wants him to be comfortable. Then she says I need to build him a stove. How am I supposed to build him a stove? She saw my pot. It wasnt very pot-like. And better yet, we are building a trap here not a lepre-condo! She said that he needed to be able to cook for himself in there because we were keeping him once we caught him. Well let me just say when she got done with his bed I think it was nicer than the actual bed I sleep on. Well we finally finsish the trap/apartment and let me tell you my living room looked like tinkerbell exploded in my house. There was glitter everywhere. I almost forgot, B also made a snowman out of playdoh for the apartment. He was glittered up aswell. Apparently everything had to have glitter on it to attract this fellow. You know how hard it is to clean up glitter? Pretty hard. My vacuum did ok except for that the wheels now have glitter all over them so there is a nice glitter path through the entire house. And i have it all over me too, looking like david bowie with glitter all around my eyes.
Anyway, here is a picture of the finished product
Happy St. Patricks Day
Oh and my buddy's kids placed 1st and fourth in the pine wood derby car race
peace out
So B started pre-k last year and before everyone gets started I know it is the middle of the year but she is in school and thats all that matters. Well she had an assignment to build a leprechaun trap. I originally thought why not just go buy a regualar trap for a racoon or possum and be done with it. Well obviously that was not going to work so I had to come up with something creative. The problem here is I've been told in the past that I do not have a creative bone in my body. Seriously I was told that. But what I lack in creativity I make up for with sarcassam. Anyway, so I figured what we could do is get us a shoe box and paint it and then put some glitter on it and some cotton balls for clouds and B could color some rainbows. Which at this point in the story I was starting to get a bit concerned with how fabulous I wanted this trap to turn out.
Well I had to run my ideas by B and see what she thought about it. She was on board. Her biggest concern was what we would do with the leprechaun once we captured him. I had some suggestions but she was not keen on them. So we needed to make a trip to Hobby Lobby to procure the needed supplies because unlike popular belief I don't keep a lot of glitter and such at my house. Whilst we are shopping for supplies we find what will make some good fake gold coins for the trap. Now I had already decided if I could fashion a pot out of construction paper that would be marvelous. After we got the "cons" B proceeds to hatch a plan for the capturing of the Green Bastard. We will put the coins in the trap, he will try to eat the coins because he is greedy as she informed me thus causing him to fall ill, and then we will be able to catch him.I told her I thought it was mean that we would try to make him sick to which she replied,"Well its better than your idea daddy. You wanted to kill him." Touche, kiddo, touche. So now we have gold glitter, gold coins, glue, and glitter clue. I am not sure why I purchased glitter glue when I just bought all the ingredients for glitter clue as well but hey thats what B said we needed. Oh and green spray paint.
so that afternoon we go to a birthday party and after it was over my buddy said we should work on the trap and his two daughters pinewood derby cars. Now last year he did this and his daughters did not do very well in the race. That was not going to be the case this year apparently because he had manuals for how to tweak the cars, axle finishing tools, and wheel smoothing mandrels. I am not making this up at all. Seems there is a whole section of pine wood derby car supplies at the Hobby Lobby as well not just Liberace decorating materials. So we have two stations setup in his barn. The leprechaun trap painting section and the derby car tuning station. The trap painting was pretty simple. Or so it wud seem but a four year old and a can of spray paint does not make a good pairing. There are portions of the trap that have a very good, thick coat of green paint on it. I didnt know you could actually mound up paint like that. The derby tuning was a bit simpler mainly because it didnt seem that we were actually doing anything. You just had to put each axle which looked a whole lot like a nail to me into a drill and one person started the drill while another held sand paper against it to smooth out any imperfections in the axle. See the imperfections cause friction and friction is a derby car's worst enemy. Same goes for the wheels. When they are popped out of the molds there are imerfections on them. So you go through the same type of process with them to make them as efficient as possible. I did not realize that this was going to turn into a derby car setup instructional blog but it seems to have done just that. You are all welcome. Anyway, it is getting late and its time to close up shop for the evening so we pack up the newley painted trap and head home.
The next morning its time to complete the construction of the trap. So B takes a paint brush and coats he inside with glue and then we pour in the glitter. While she does this I fashion me a cauldron out of construction paper. Lets just sa in my mind it looked a lot better. I guess I really don't have any creativity in me. B colors some rainbows to glue on the trap and I find some cotton balls for her to glue to it as well to simulate clouds because remember we are trying to lure a leprechaun into the trap. B starts on the cloud project and I step out of the room because why wouldn't you leave your daughter with a bowl of glue, glitter, and cotton balls? Well when I come back she is no longer working on clouds. Oh no. She is making him a bed in the trap because she wants him to be comfortable. Then she says I need to build him a stove. How am I supposed to build him a stove? She saw my pot. It wasnt very pot-like. And better yet, we are building a trap here not a lepre-condo! She said that he needed to be able to cook for himself in there because we were keeping him once we caught him. Well let me just say when she got done with his bed I think it was nicer than the actual bed I sleep on. Well we finally finsish the trap/apartment and let me tell you my living room looked like tinkerbell exploded in my house. There was glitter everywhere. I almost forgot, B also made a snowman out of playdoh for the apartment. He was glittered up aswell. Apparently everything had to have glitter on it to attract this fellow. You know how hard it is to clean up glitter? Pretty hard. My vacuum did ok except for that the wheels now have glitter all over them so there is a nice glitter path through the entire house. And i have it all over me too, looking like david bowie with glitter all around my eyes.
Anyway, here is a picture of the finished product
Happy St. Patricks Day
Oh and my buddy's kids placed 1st and fourth in the pine wood derby car race
peace out
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Simulated Tennis
So a co-worker asked if I would be interested in "joining" the tennis league at the recreation department. I thought, sure why not. I used to play a little tennis in college with friends and I consider myself to be an athlete. Now this is based on no type of actual factual data mind you. I never played any kind of sports other than football in the fifth grade, which back then I had no clue what was going on. Regardless I am a superior athlete. I said it therefore it is now true. Deal with it. So the deal is we would go on Thursday nights and play mixed doubles. Which I thought would be cool. Whats not cool about playing with women and after they all saw my athletic abilities they would all be swooning after me. But we shall get to that later. So I agreed to go out for tennis.
So in order to prepare for my coming out of retirement tennis match (I come out of retirement form a lot of different sports. I've un-retired from bodybuilding for the last four years four different times I think) I needed to visualize a plan of attack. And that's were the simulated tennis comes in. Wednesday after our sales meeting I was outside on the dealership lot with my tennis playing co-worker when an impromptu tennis match broke out. Now there were no racquet's, no tennis balls, not even a court but I was running back and forth in a shirt and tie putting my skills on display. My simulated serves looked good. My net presence was great. I could cover the court with ease. I won that match in straight sets 6-2 6-1 and 6-0. I was unstoppable. On a side not if spielberg or anyone for that matter that has a fancy dreamworks type computer setup and could cgi a court and ball and such around a video of my simulated tennis match, much like they did the ping pong in forest gump, it would be Wimbledon quality tennis. I felt good about my game.
I thought it would be appropriate that I have another match on Thursday just to visualize my plan of attack for that night. Well this did not go un-noticed by management who commented that I had already played at least 5 matches at work and that they would remember that when it came to pay day which I can only assume that they are giving me an endorsement check which is awesome because I didn't even have to ask for it. They recognize the talent and obviously want to get in on the ground floor of my upcoming ATP tour domination.
Thursday night rolls around and its time to play. Now I have spent the better part of the week telling my co-worker that I will dominate him on the court and would'nt you know it the coordinator puts us on the same team. So now I have to rethink my game plan. Our first opponents are a man and woman. Both older than us. That match is no problem 6-0. Alright on to the next team. A 82 year old man and a 64 year old man with two bad knees and an artificial hip. This was almost wrong to even do. But its athletic competition and if you aren't able to play stay of the court. This was a little more challenging not really. Match over 6-3. Now onto our last opponent. The tennis pro if you will and another woman. Its getting late and a little chilly so lets get this over quick. Done. 6-0
Now I should point out that all those match scores were in the opponents favor. We only won three games out of the entire three matches we played and that was against the two old guys. It was like we were playing badminton while everyone else was playing tennis. It was awful. I don't like the taste of humble pie and as most people know I love cakes and pies. Not that one though. So needless to say there is a lot of work that needs to be done before next week. More simulated matches will need to be played whilst at work.
And by the way the ladies that I figured would be swooning? Yeah well that didn't happen either.
So in order to prepare for my coming out of retirement tennis match (I come out of retirement form a lot of different sports. I've un-retired from bodybuilding for the last four years four different times I think) I needed to visualize a plan of attack. And that's were the simulated tennis comes in. Wednesday after our sales meeting I was outside on the dealership lot with my tennis playing co-worker when an impromptu tennis match broke out. Now there were no racquet's, no tennis balls, not even a court but I was running back and forth in a shirt and tie putting my skills on display. My simulated serves looked good. My net presence was great. I could cover the court with ease. I won that match in straight sets 6-2 6-1 and 6-0. I was unstoppable. On a side not if spielberg or anyone for that matter that has a fancy dreamworks type computer setup and could cgi a court and ball and such around a video of my simulated tennis match, much like they did the ping pong in forest gump, it would be Wimbledon quality tennis. I felt good about my game.
I thought it would be appropriate that I have another match on Thursday just to visualize my plan of attack for that night. Well this did not go un-noticed by management who commented that I had already played at least 5 matches at work and that they would remember that when it came to pay day which I can only assume that they are giving me an endorsement check which is awesome because I didn't even have to ask for it. They recognize the talent and obviously want to get in on the ground floor of my upcoming ATP tour domination.
Thursday night rolls around and its time to play. Now I have spent the better part of the week telling my co-worker that I will dominate him on the court and would'nt you know it the coordinator puts us on the same team. So now I have to rethink my game plan. Our first opponents are a man and woman. Both older than us. That match is no problem 6-0. Alright on to the next team. A 82 year old man and a 64 year old man with two bad knees and an artificial hip. This was almost wrong to even do. But its athletic competition and if you aren't able to play stay of the court. This was a little more challenging not really. Match over 6-3. Now onto our last opponent. The tennis pro if you will and another woman. Its getting late and a little chilly so lets get this over quick. Done. 6-0
Now I should point out that all those match scores were in the opponents favor. We only won three games out of the entire three matches we played and that was against the two old guys. It was like we were playing badminton while everyone else was playing tennis. It was awful. I don't like the taste of humble pie and as most people know I love cakes and pies. Not that one though. So needless to say there is a lot of work that needs to be done before next week. More simulated matches will need to be played whilst at work.
And by the way the ladies that I figured would be swooning? Yeah well that didn't happen either.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Anytown USA
So its been really nice weather for the last week or so. This coming after an unusually cold winter. Well Sunday its 80 degrees and I've all the windows open to let some fresh air in. Well i would really enjoy the front door open but I have a few problems with that scenario. 1) I don't want bugs coming in. 2)I don't want my cats coming in for several reasons and the main one being reason 3)I don't want B's parakeets flying out/getting killed by the cats. So there are two solutions to this problem. Either leave the door closed...or the obvious solution, put up a screen door. Now I've wanted a screen door for some time now but never really looked into screen door prices.
So I mosey on over to Lowes Home Improvement Warehouse (I don't know if there are any legal implications to me refering to an actual corporation in this blog)and look at screen doors. Well they can be quite pricey, but not the one I got. Oh no. 33 bucks after tax and I have a wooden screen door and all the necessary hardware. Now a simple install whilst (I like the word whilst) B and Walden play in the yard. A tweak here and there and boom, screen door folks. Now it needs some paint and I will get to that later, but come on I've got a screen door.
Now let me tell you about how I enjoy this screen door. When I get home I open the front door, turn on the porch light and sit down and listen to the sounds of the outside. Monday night it actually started to rain and I turned off all the lights and the tv and went to sleep with the door open listening to the rain. Well that was the last night that it was warmish. For the last two nights its been so chilly out that I've had to wear more clothes while in the house than I've worn all day all week. But by golly I was gonna have that front door open.
So I mosey on over to Lowes Home Improvement Warehouse (I don't know if there are any legal implications to me refering to an actual corporation in this blog)and look at screen doors. Well they can be quite pricey, but not the one I got. Oh no. 33 bucks after tax and I have a wooden screen door and all the necessary hardware. Now a simple install whilst (I like the word whilst) B and Walden play in the yard. A tweak here and there and boom, screen door folks. Now it needs some paint and I will get to that later, but come on I've got a screen door.
Now let me tell you about how I enjoy this screen door. When I get home I open the front door, turn on the porch light and sit down and listen to the sounds of the outside. Monday night it actually started to rain and I turned off all the lights and the tv and went to sleep with the door open listening to the rain. Well that was the last night that it was warmish. For the last two nights its been so chilly out that I've had to wear more clothes while in the house than I've worn all day all week. But by golly I was gonna have that front door open.
Happy day after National Pancake Day!
So its been almost a full year since I last posted and have been giving it a lot of thought to start posting again. So here is my attempt at getting back in the saddle.
lets get everyone caught up:
I have actually been working at a job for the last year. When I started this blog I was unemployed and tried that for a year. It was good times but financially a very bad idea. I work at a car dealership now and some of the things that I hear on a daily basis will work well for posts such as "What I learned at work today".
Anyway, so national pancake day came and went and I did not recieve a single pancake bouquet. I dont know if they exist but they should and someone out there should have sent me one. Ok Im going to go now but I will try very hard to do a better job at posting more often.
peace
lets get everyone caught up:
I have actually been working at a job for the last year. When I started this blog I was unemployed and tried that for a year. It was good times but financially a very bad idea. I work at a car dealership now and some of the things that I hear on a daily basis will work well for posts such as "What I learned at work today".
Anyway, so national pancake day came and went and I did not recieve a single pancake bouquet. I dont know if they exist but they should and someone out there should have sent me one. Ok Im going to go now but I will try very hard to do a better job at posting more often.
peace
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